I’m always on the look out for articles, book, people, products quotes that give me a new way to look at making space for my big ideas and making them happen.

When I find something that interests me…I kinda go a little nutso and do act like a junior high girl crushing on a senior.  It’s all I can think about – now of course it’s more my hunger for knowledge.  I love new ideas.  So….

Since I’m constantly finding new goodies, trying out new things – I’m going to start sharing them a few times per month or whenever it feels right! Make sure to let me know when you like something I’ve suggested!

Every single recommended resource I’ve either discovered on my own, purchased and am using and/or someone else has asked me to find the resource and I suspect others might need it too!

Here are some highly recommended resources that I’ve been using for the past week month:

How To Start A Blog That Matters: I believe blogging is where seeds of your revolution can be sowed and grown over time. Since people are online – it doesn’t matter what your focus is – or if you even write every single day.

Blogging is one of those no-brainer activities for learning how to express yourself and gather the people around you who like what you’re saying, support you when you need and learn from your experience.

Invaluable training from Corbett Barr and the team at Think Traffic.

The price is LOW (for only a few more days!!!) considering you get a lifetime membership to the members area – and there is a growing community inside the protected area to learn and grow from!

I’ve been working through the lessons in this course to take own my site to the next level…and the course has helped me really get to the core of my message.

If you’re just starting out or have been writing online for awhile, check this course out.

*Also, if you pick up the program and join me inside, I’ll send you the all-access package of my ebook The White Space Solution.

Post from LiveYourLegend.net: Does What You’re Doing Actually Matter?
If you’re looking for a way to make money from your passion, look no further. Scott’s site is a resource that I go to often for inspiration and to witness really quality writing.

Post from SarahBurns at theohanamama.com: Find Your Super
When I read this post from Sarah – I didn’t just read it once…I read it 2x, then another, then another. The message is so clear, so real, and makes me honored to know her. This is what it’s all about.

Post from Danielle LA PORTE: In Honor Of The Fact That Life Is Short
Another post that made me stop, take a breath, and truly feel something. Not a lot of posts can do that to me (or maybe anyone for that matter).

What I’m Re-Reading...
Rich Dad, Poor Dad: My relationship with money and earning has been on the off side for most of my life.

I won’t blame my parents, but clearly I did learn how to behave with money and how to respect/not respect it’s value in my life.
I remembered this book really caused me to shift when I first read it, so when I found it during a huge garage clean out this weekend, I pulled it to read AGAIN.

Ok – that’s it for this week – see you again, when I have another round of people, places, things to watch!

Disclaimer: some times the links on this site will be affiliate links – which means that there could be a commission paid to me if you purchase. I’d appreciate it if you keep in mind that these links support the life of this site and the courses I’m developing for you!

 image credit:  Pink Sherbet Photography

How are you feeling today?

Are you ready to step out? Out of the shadows? Out of what feels comfortable?

Are you prepared to change some things in your life?

I am.

Now you maybe thinking you’re not ready to share anything with the world yet.  But I dare you to think otherwise.

Over the past few weeks I’ve been sharing as much as I can about what it takes to start the journey to making your big thing come alive–the little things you don’t think about which can give you that fuel to start.

Want that business to start bringing in money? Want to finish that project you started but put on a shelf because you didn’t have enough time?  Want your blog to get better traffic? Want people to come out of the woodwork to help you?

There are only 4 things you need to do to set your pins up. (sorry – weird bowling reference…but I digress).

You may have missed my previous post and those lessons…no worries–let me break it down for you.

1. Accept + Own Your Revolution.

Make room in your life for it. Get to know it. Own it. Speak it out loud to people you trust FIRST. Then, yell it from the rooftops.  Here’s the big secret: your revolution can be about changing a few individuals or a larger number of people. It doesn’t matter – both improve the world in my opinion.  Another secret? Your revolution might be an idea you’ve pushed off as unrealistic or something you don’t have time to pursue.

Read + Watch:  Get Ready To Make Room For Your Revolution

2. Learn To Say No With Grace.

Saying no is the first step to setting priorities.  What do you say no to in your life?  Anything?  Be okay saying, no thank you.  Or, I’d rather not.  Or , that’s not for me.

Read:  The Most Important Word You’ll Say This Year (part one)
Read this too: The Most Important Word You’ll Say This Year (part two)

3. Be You.

Go all balls to the wall and be you…or go home.  Let yourself be openly excited about your passions.  Whether you write, sing, paint, talk – whatever…do it like you’re singing for your supper – and damn you want a good one.

Read + Prepare:  Why You Better Start Telling The Truth About Yourself Today

4. Let Go Already.

This is the hardest of the 4 steps in my opinion.  Why? Because sometimes you might not even know you’re holding on to the past or to a dream that’s lying dormant in the back of your brain somewhere.  Spend time clearing out that muck that’s stopping you from taking action, saying no, making space, being yourself.

reference: The Manifesto of Letting Go

Why This Is Important

These 4 steps will help you no matter who you are or what you want out of life.

But – if you’re an entrepreneur – which many of you reading this are (or would like to be), you know that building a business requires a lot of work and perseverance and focus AND consistency…you must DO THE WORK and continually strive to practice these principles.

It’s Your Choice

If you decide NOT TO LEARN AND IMPLEMENT these principles…

Something will always be lagging, holding you back, making you second guess yourself, stopping you from launching yourself, your book, your blog or your business…

Do you want to feel like you’re constantly pushing and nothing is happening? That no one is listening?  Like if you disappeared off the grid anyone would care?

People miss honesty. The real you. With all your little bits, pieces, nooks and crannies.

The Good News + Your Turn

You don’t have to go it alone.  There are people around you everywhere who can support you and your goals…you probably just haven’t asked them yet.

But to get you started – I’ve created a worksheet that goes through all these principles…and asks the question in one spot.

The only thing I ask of you is that you revisit the worksheet regularly – don’t answer the questions once and consider yourself done.

You will change over time and so will your answers.

DOWNLOAD THE PDF NOW (no sign up required)

Imagine – in an hour or less – you could have a realistic and clear idea of how to start sharing your revolution to the world.

I’d love to know what you thought of the last few posts – I’ve already heard from many of you, but not everyone, so comment below or send me an email!

What else can you do?  Please click on the buttons at the top to share on Twitter, FB, and all those fun social places.

The end of the year is a painful time for me — even though there is so much joy going on around me.

It never fails that at some point during the 2 weeks surrounding Christmas, a melancholy cloud floats over me and the part of my brain that I’d locked away suddenly opens up and starts f-ing with all the relaxing and good cheer I get to experience during the holidays.

Painful things float to the surface that I haven’t let go of. Dreams and goals that weren’t reached. Rejections that I can’t seem to forget.  Failures that seem bigger and more important than the victories.

I literally feel like I’m standing on the scale in my bathroom and the weight of all this yuck is making me see a number and person I don’t want to see.

I’m measuring my worth and the “how was this year” rating by these not so great negatives hanging onto my psyche.

We’ve all got a pile of stuff we hold onto in our physical world, in our emotions, in our heads…things that happened, didn’t happen…and for some reason many of us can’t quite move forward.

But there’s a bright side to all this! I swear! I won’t take you to the depths and leave you there.

THANK GOODNESS 2011 WAS DIFFERENT.

You see, even though I’ve got plenty to resolve myself, I’ve learned what it feels (and looks) like and how to actually let go of some of this painful stuff in order to make room for a life that matches my vision.

Why do we hold onto the past – even when it no longer makes any sense?

Well, I know why I hold onto the past and specifically the things I don’t really need anymore and I suspect many of you feel the same…

And here it is… it feels more comfortable and familiar to keep doing the same thing and thinking the same thoughts and complaining about the same things every day.

Did you read that? It feels more comfortable to keep feeling the same way.

What The Funk?

We get caught up in all of our drama and the reasons that we live the way we do, that it’s hard to let anything go. It gives us identity, something to talk about, something for others to talk about (about us!)…it’s crazy but we like that people talk about us when we’re not around…

The tough reality is this:  this idea is who we wanted to be or still think we are, but haven’t actually looked in the mirror to face in a long time.

It’s scary to admit we aren’t something or someone we thought we were or didn’t get what we told everyone we wanted.

It feels like a gaping void where we have no identity.

But you can’t live like that forever and expect to experience success in other areas of your life.

Each day you spend clinging to a past, outdated definition of yourself, it makes it that much harder to break.

Pretty soon – life has passed you and you’re in the rut for good!

Or so you think.

Break The Pattern Now

If you want the world to see you differently and to start having new opportunities…here’s a hint.

It’s all on you….

Drop your own definitions of yourself.

Here’s an easy way to do it…call yourself out and just ask yourself – WHO ARE YOU?

Take a moment right now to ask yourself who you are.  Don’t worry – there’s no test here, but be completely honest with yourself.

If you want – write it down.

If writing doesn’t do it for you…Look at yourself in the eyes in the mirror.  Deep in the eyes and say “Who are you?”  It feels weird, I know.  I have a tough time doing this exercise as well.

Now – listen to what answer you get.  It may surprise you.

Letting Go Is A Process

Since you have a shockingly consistent flow of ideas and dreams in your brain throughout your life, you can’t just do this once and be done with it.  That’s why I created a manifesto or little reminders that tell me when it’s time to let go of something.   Read on to see my manifesto in progress…

The Manifesto of Letting Go & Moving Forward

Now, I’m going to share with the world – for the very first time – my ever-growing Manifesto of Letting Go & Making Peace.

You’ll see a lot of talk about dreams – what can I say…I’m a dreamer!!!

If you have that creative spirit, you probably have a lot of unfinished dreams floating around in your head – or slam dancing depending on how much room there is left to “float”.

If you want to print the whole thing out or save it for later, let me know and I’ll send my own pdf.

1. Dreams are meant for you only if it fits your current life and goals.

2. Letting go of dreams doesn’t make them failures.

3. When people no longer uplift your life, you owe it to yourself to decide whether you can afford to keep them in your life.

4. Changing your mind at any point in your life is your prerogative.

5. Stop chasing dreams you don’t really want anymore.

6. Holding onto a dead dream prevents you from dreaming new dreams and making them a reality.

7.  Schedule regular time to review your goals and big dreams – to make sure they are all relevant.

8. Prioritize and re-prioritize your dreams often.

9.  If you can’t decide what to do with a dream, take 1 step or action toward the end goal. Then, ask yourself again if you want it. Rinse. Repeat.

10.  If you’ve had a dream longer than 1 year and you’ve done NOTHING to further it, drop it.

11.  Spend time everyday to dream new dreams and keep them somewhere they can percolate until you are ready for them.

12.  Take 1 action every day on an important dream

13.  Focus on 1 dream at a time.

14. Take responsibility for dreams that didn’t become reality.

15.  Drop any dream that doesn’t scare you a little.

16.  Share your dreams with people who care about you, but don’t give a shit if they don’t support you.

17.  Don’t immediately reject dreams suggested by other people…consider them and then decide what’s right for you.

18.  People have expectations for you – you do not need to fulfill every expectation no matter what these people tell you.

19.  Let go when you are good and ready, but know that it has to happen at some point.

20.  The sooner you let go the sooner you’ll be able to move forward.

If you are an entrepreneur with no shortage of ideas and dreams, you’ll understand why most of my letting go manifesto is about THAT.

Letting go frees up white space…makes room for new opportunities, new dreams…and best of all…NEW ACTION.

If you want to start a business, finish your book, start your book, paint that masterpiece…then you have to be brave and LET GO of something that doesn’t serve you any more.

We all have that kind of sludge floating around in our psyches…

What do you tell yourself in order to let go of a past dream or story about yourself?

You might need to find a friend you really trust to help you go through some past dreams. Someone you feel comfortable with telling you to let certain things go… it’s a tough thing to hear from people you care about, but a powerful experience.

Leave a comment below and share something you will let go today.

image credit:  Capture Queen

(aka this is also the post where I share some things I probably shouldn’t, but I’m sick of pretending…consider yourself warned!)

Inspired by the idea of revealing more about myself, what I do, and encouraging you to do the same, I decided to make a list of some slightly random things you probably don’t know about me.

It’s taken me a long time to get to this point where I’m comfortable being myself in what I write.  The more I do though…the more opportunities come to me, the more emails I get, the more connections I create.

Connections are the pathway of how your revolution will come to be. So, take this public declaration as a challenge to you to do the same asap.

Just so you aren’t expecting a resume of jobs or a dry account of my life, I give you this photo of myself cutting a birthday cake with a huge sword from Guild Wars the game – I think I got it while working for the game dev company.  At the time I was a heavy user of World of Warcraft or maybe it was Everquest at that point.

This is me.  I’m a bit of a freak.  Which leads very nicely into #1.

Without further adieu – enjoy 41 things you probably don’t need to know about me but you might find amusing…and I’m not apologising if you’re offended.

1. I have a weird fear of costumed people…Halloween, Santa Claus…you name it.  Beware if you are a person employed in this way – I’ve been known to say “get away from me you freak” on more than 1 occasion. I think I need to ask my mom if something happened when I was a child.

2. When I was recovering from the birth of my daughter and on Percocet I thought I saw an Ewok in my hospital room…and the walls were really buzzing.

3.  I used to read to my elementary school teachers instead of going to recess…wow, they musta really loved never having a break from little miss know it all.

4.  I am a spelling bee winner – made it to State finals and then choked on the word obituary. Can anyone guess how I tried to spell it? I sounded it out and went for it.

5. All of my jobs were at start up companies, new divisions of companies and for small businesses. I’ve worked in the trenches and seem some big wins and lots of big failures.

6.  I hate to say I hate something, but, well, I really hate it when people say unnecessary mean things against others and mean it…especially when that happens to me.  I don’t get that kind of mentality of intentionally hurting someone.  It’s cruel and I immediately think, karma dude, karma.

7.  On the other hand, I can find comedy in people, jobs, other cultures (especially the Russians) and you might overhear me and think I sound rude, but I’m laughing at the entire human race…mostly because we are all kind of hilarious and RIDICULOUS.

8.  I love shopping. ‘Nuff said.  Currently love Aritzia up here in the PSW.

9.  I love Apple products – I don’t need another macbook, but I am currently trying to come up with enough legit reasons I should buy a new one.

10.  My favorite tv shows are Dexter, Breaking Bad, and The Walking Dead…I’ll also watch American Idol every chance I get…and sometimes sneak a Biggest Loser episode.

11.  I’ve lived in big cities – east and west coast – Boston, LA, Seattle, and grew up in a small town with under 1000 people with a high school graduating class of 32 people.

12. I’ve worked in 3 different areas of the entertainment industry: tv/film production, documentary production, and visual effects.  This is where I learned to handle complex parts of any technical process and jumped into working online (with a totally different set of tools and processes) with no problem or learning curve.

13.  I sometimes work 7 days a week – and will get up on weekends to write for as long as Mila will let me and my husband forces me to go take a shower. I’m not proud of this fact.

14.  I love SEO and learning about it (not sure what that means? Google it – laugh at me if you wish!).

15.  I love learning – and when I get into a subject, I kind of lose myself a little by diving in deep.

16. Topics that got the dive deep treatment:  Panama (8), Hypnosis and Astral Projection (16), Sreenwriting (20s), Singing and Performing (20s), Pilates (now-ish), and Online Business (now-ish!).

17.  I have a really hard time relaxing, but I’m working on it!

18. If there was one thing I’d like to do but haven’t taken action on it’s decorating my home.

19. I like helping people figure out what they want to do – by breaking things down to a super simple list – I’m talking anyone who comes to me with a bit  of overwhelm and I’m on their list in 2 seconds flat.

20. I have a gift for seeing subtle changes in people’s silhouette, mood, and energy. This comes in handy a lot.

21.  I can count my true friends on 1 hand.

22.  It makes me sad that I can’t see my friends more than once or twice a year.

23.  Over the past 2 years I’ve written this blog – I’ve been wishing I could find a way to talk more about work and building a strong business, but was ashamed and worried and didn’t feel like I could.

24. Most interesting job I ever had? I read books to an author who had a serious degenerative eye disease (author’s name: Andrew Potok).  Most memorable read: biography of an Ethiopian King.

25.   If there was 1 thing I’d like to tell you it’s that you are not alone – I’m here and I’m actively looking for a way to show you how to have more of that life you always wanted.

26.  I’m a true optimist and often get called out on it in not so nice ways…

27. I love watching my daughter eat. It’s sick, but now I kind of understand the whole “Eat, Eaaaat” mentality many parents and grandparents have toward their children.  I just want her to eat!

28.  I’m a systems geek but I have trouble keeping myself in check…

29.  I’m always thinking of the psychology side of a problem — even when the best systems are in place, the mind doesn’t gel with them because of belief systems that might be out of wack.

30.  I stopped teaching pilates because I seemed to attract too many flakes and unreliable people as clients.  I loved them dearly but after I had a baby, it was impossible to accommodate and juggle babysitter, studio, and clients who didn’t think it was a problem to show up late and cancel.

31.  My favorite video game is World of Warcraft; though I’m currently knee deep in the latest Star Wars MMO.

32.  Even though I’m pale and never spend time tanning – I’m a sun lover at heart.  I prefer living in a sunny, bright environment.  The rain and grey weather gets to me quickly. (And yes…I just moved to Seattle. We’ll see how this goes!)

33.  I recorded my first single with Grammy award winning producer/arrangers who worked with Tori Amos, Tracey Chapman and Janet Jackson.

34. I’m a teacher at heart – I’ve taught african dance, pilates, flute, drama, how to install wordpress, how to use filemaker pro, how to write an ebook, and soon I’ll be teaching how to publish on Kindle.

35. My biggest work accomplishments to date all surround pulling an amazing team together and being the gel that gets everyone to do their best work for the end goal.

36.  I love books.  I love touching books, reading books, being around books.  My downfall with books is that I often don’t get to fully finish a book.  I used to feel bad about that, but now I don’t!

37.  I like to bake challah bread.  Yum.

38.  My favorite color is black and I’ve been ridiculed for it my whole life.

39.  I was an exchange student in Turkey for 5 months and it taught me the importance of family, spending time with the people you love and how to make kick ass baklava.

40.  What’s my biggest regret in life to date?  That I wasn’t as honest as I could have been in times when I was leaving situations.  I always wanted to NOT hurt people…and my silence and lack of disclosure ended hurting them anyways.  I feel like I’ve spent a lot of time making up for these errors when I was younger.

41.  My husband is a tough Russian guy who ALWAYS calls me out when I’m being whiny..and I do get whiny.  He deals with my mood swings and insane energy like a champ.  I credit his tough Siberian upbringing for this ability to deal with me!

So there you have it…in all my glory…I’m sure I could go on…but I know this is a long enough list as it is.  Thanks for getting all the way to the end as I opened up the closet and let my skeletons fall out.  Truthfully, this doesn’t even scratch the surface, but it’s all real and all me.

Please leave a comment below or share the post on social media if you enjoyed what you read.

Thanks to Corbett Barr for inspiring this post.  He issued a challenge at the end of his own tell-all post and I took it.

Your Challenge: Write your own list in the comments below if you dare!

If you’re ready to be successful in the real world – and not just your head – the absolute first step you can take is OWNING your definition of success.  We all have a different one – and the sooner you own it, share it, and feel okay with other people knowing about it, the better.

Do the people around you know about your dreams, goals, and aspirations?  Do your friends and family know what’s important to you?  Or do you hide them or push them down inside so even you don’t have to look at them?

Well, if you’ve been hiding yourself even a tiny bit – and we all do it, today I want to encourage you to step out of your own shadow.

After all, if you want to share your revolution, you can’t stay in the background.

Why We Hide

We all hide different parts of ourselves that we aren’t proud of or are embarrassed to admit because it doesn’t fit the YOU everyone expects to see.

I’ve been guilty of doing this on many occasion.  In fact, I remember going for a series of job interviews, consciously being who they wanted me to be, getting each and every offer, and then realizing that none of the jobs would have ended up making me happy.

I turned 5 insanely good job offers down. I knew they weren’t right for me…so I let them go.

I’ve seen businesses try to serve every single potential client that walked through the door, but never really making a clear declaration of the types of projects they did or the type of people they worked with…and well, those companies are no more now.

It’s all the same really — whether you do it in your personal or your work life.

You don’t talk about certain things with certain people because you are afraid of their reaction.  And all the while, you get to be around people and take on projects that suck the life out of you.

Gratz. How is that working for you?

Not only is it total torture, but truth is that omission can also be a form of lying.

Do you want to be seen as distrustful or lacking integrity?

Awareness Is Key

Knowing why you hide what you do and then just letting go can help you see yourself and what you want a little more clearly.

You are not shadows.  You are not fear of rejection and ridicule.  You are not this person with no face or dreams.  You do have children.  You do love working at home.  You don’t really want that job.  You don’t really like going this person’s parties. You do want to start your own business. You are writing a book of poetry.  You are starting your own business.

Don’t let this game of hiding define you anymore.

Be ok with your love of the Pussycat Dolls even though all your friends love Coldplay or “more serious, respectable music.”

Be okay that you want to write a book online though many of your published friends who scoff at the value you’re providing.

Be okay with the blog you’re writing and changing even if you’re not sure how people will take the new you.

Be okay working out in front of other people – who cares if you’re jiggly – that’s why you work out!  Be okay that others don’t share your enthusiasm or hope.

Be proud of the pole dancing studio you want to start.

BE OKAY with yourself and your goals.

Getting To Know You: A Case Study

A few months ago I began sharing a bit more about who I am and what I do for work…

If you’re not on the mailing list, you may have missed one of my most revealing emails where I gave a true account of how I spend my days.

Email me and I’ll send it to you if you’d like the details too.

I started asking you who you were… what you do and what challenges you face. And I have to admit, I was kind of shocked.

See, in many ways, I’ve been holding back talking about starting a business, writing your book, creating your first product, creating systems to help you build your biz while your baby’s at your feet…because…well, I didn’t think that’s who you were or that you’d even care.

I was stopping myself from talking about something that I’m truly passionate about – self-expression, creativity, business, and the energy at the start of any new venture.

I made a judgement or assumption about someone or a group and allowed it to hold me back from being myself.  Have you ever done that?

Take a moment to remember why you acted the way you did – and why you didn’t think it was okay to be you.

For me – I know exactly why I didn’t think it was okay:

I didn’t think I could talk about those things with you.

I didn’t want to bother you with the topics that fill my head and keep my eyes a-blaze on the ceiling many nights during the week.

I didn’t know you had dreams of owning your own business or being self-employed or working from home or that you wanted to find a job that would allow you to travel or live on your laptop or that you’ve always wanted to have a gallery opening and paint or knit a line of hats to sell at the local craft fair or that you wanted to build custom pilates reformers (oh wait, I DID know about that one.).

I didn’t know that you wanted to talk more about the exact things I WAS WISHING I could talk to you about.

What happens when you find out that the people around you are different than you thought they were?

And…oddly enough they are more kindred spirits than you EVER expected?

I’ll tell you what happens – you do a little happy dance – show your moves like Jagger – and sigh with relief.

[Happy Dance with many Moves Like Jagger ensued…no joke!]

This is so me though…I’ve done this over and over again in my life.  I walk around thinking I’m so dang different from everyone else and then find out that the people I surround myself with are EXACTLY like me.

Then, it hit me…just like I’m about to hit you with it:

You are special but you aren’t different. We are all the same.

We all want the same freedom, the same peace, the same excitement, and no one really likes anyone “to be the boss of me.”

So…knowing what I know now…I’m not going to let you sit idle for more than a week.

I won’t pretend that all you want is generic motivation advice.

I won’t let you tell yourself any more stories about WHY you haven’t done what I KNOW you want to do.

Consider yourself no longer off the hook.

Your Turn

Go back to the question I asked earlier – have you ever altered or outright lied about who you were and then got smacked in the end because you weren’t being yourself? Or have you ever had a time when you kept being exactly who everyone else thought you should be?

Why did you do that?

What’s the worst thing that could happen if you decided to just drop the mask – be yourself, tell people your dreams, desires, and what you do?

Now what’s the best thing that could happen?

Now some harder questions…just between you and me:

Is there one or more things you want to accomplish but are either not sure how to get started or you’re not sure why you haven’t started?

Are you having a hard time because you haven’t “seen” anyone else do what you want to do? Or maybe too many people doing something a certain way and it doesn’t quite fit you?

Are you afraid that your friends and family will “find out”?

Or…are you just so in your head with all your goals that you’re on the brink of giving up simply because you need perspective?

If you’re nodding your head or answered yes to any of these, it’s time to step out now.

Email me and let me know what you’re struggling with and that my dear dear friend is your first step to changing your current path – and making room for your revolution.